Enough is enough
by Isabella Ballerina
Summary: Where is my story book ending? Who am i? Will i ever find myself? Maybe. Maybe not.
1. Chapter 1

_**AN: The characters don't belong to me even if I wish they did =] **_

_**Hey guys this is just a little of a story I had in mind and just couldn't seem to get rid of so tell me what you think about it and if I should keep going I want this part to be longer and more in-depth I just wanted to get a little of it out there so I will be adding more to it later **_

_**So enough of me and on the reading =]**_

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Tears fell to the page of my book highlighting the words love and lost, which I found ironic. Those two words held more meaning to me then the rest that lay upon the page. For I wish to be loved by someone and here I sit lost above anything else. It wasn't that the tears were for those reasons alone. I Cried because I sit here feeling sorry for myself. Yet I don't know what to do about it. You see the problem is that I'm all alone or at least I feel that way. I do live with my dad, not that that does anything to help me. For we never get along. Never have, never will. It seems destine to be that way.

You know the story book dad everybody wants. One that give you hugs, tells you what an amazing job your doing. He is there for dance recitals, baseball games, and other things you were involved in. He does anything and everything. He is there no matter what. Well reality seems to show me what life is really like. You see for me it seems I can never make my dad, Charlie happy. I get all A's and just one B on my report card and instead of being happy that I've done well, he tells me how bad I've done and that it's not good enough. I'm not a bad kid, I never get in trouble, I don't do drugs or alcohol, I'm not pregnant in fact I don't even have sex. I go to school, do what I'm told. Shouldn't that be enough? And yet here I stand and get told that I'm not good enough and never will be. Where is my story book ending?

While other girls are out with their friends having fun and being teens, I'm here being told how I will never be good enough and how fat I am. After awhile it starts to break you down. You start believing that you are those things.

So here I sit and feel sorry for myself. I don't try to stand up for myself anymore, it never works. It never did. I take it and keep taking it. It's all I can do. It's all I ever do. Will I ever get away? Will I find someone who will look past all my flaws?

Will I find out who I am?

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Reviews = Love = One happy person =]


	2. Fear

Hey guys so here is some more. I know its short, but I'm working on it. I have it in mind just to put chapter one and two together and just make one big one. I still want to add more and smooth it out bit.

So Enjoy and I would love to hear from you guys. =]

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What am I to do when I live in fear?

Fear it's a funny thing. We fear many things in life, some small some big. But what do I do when I fear one of the ones that are put there to protect me, to love me. IF this is how people show love then I'm better off without it.

I remember moments in my life when everything was calm and peaceful. But that was just for a moment then true life came knocking on my door, taunting me with its knock that disrupted my  
happiness. I don't remember the exact moment when my world shattered around me. As I look back I can see tiny changes that grew and grew and then just one day it became what it is now.

The front door slamming jolted me from my train of thought. Great I thought to myself just what I needed to make my day. I just stayed sitting there; I just wasn't ready to face it. It was like all he knew was anger; he had to be in control. He was never wrong; you were always the one that was wrong. He had an idea that if he showed anger and yelled that people would do anything he wanted. In truth it only made things worse. I see why he didn't have many friends. I see why I didn't have many friends. I was quite, shy, and I just didn't seem to fit it….. Anywhere.

I could hear his boots stomping up the stairs. I sat there and waited, just like I always did. Hoping, praying that today would be different. That there wouldn't be any yelling, name calling, that things would just be normal. For once.

But that didn't happen it never did. Dad came in my room wrenching the door open. He stood there watching. Looking around to see what I was doing. I wasn't doing anything wrong just reading, normal right? Even that wasn't good enough for him. One look and the judgment began.

"And just what do u think you're doing?" He said in a hateful tone.

"I'm reading a book." Simple enough any parent would be happy that their child sat down and read a book.

"Just like always you're being lazy. You can't do anything can you? You don't ever do anything. It's not that you can't it's just that you won't. You sit on your ass all day, while I go to work and pay your bills. Hmm when are you going to do something? I shouldn't have to take care of you. I'm so tired of doing everything for you. "

Tears start to fall. I try to hold them back but they have a mind of their own. He didn't say anything new. That being nice right there. So you see I can't do anything right. I'm not lazy, I don't think. I cook, clean, do the laundry. Dad doesn't even fix his own drinks. Yet I sit here and get called lazy and say that I never do anything. I never do.

This is his idea of nice. And to tell the truth that was nice. I wasn't even called any names. So in my book this is an ok day. A bit of luck I had there.

Dad turned around angrily out, shaking his head, mumbling things under his breath.

I turn my attention back to the window, my book long forgotten. I sit there crying, and feel sorry for myself. What a way to spend your day.

This is my normal. This is my life.

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So what do you think? To me I feel like I'm not showing enough emotion through the words hrmm something im going to work on. Let me know what you think =]


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